What would you think about a guy who is willingly getting bound to the wall of a bar? He is naked, his hands and feet are constraint. For everyone to see. Be honest.
Is he open-minded? Horny? Kinky? A slut? A weirdo? A mental case?
Would you be friends with him? Would you like to hang out with him?
Does he have a job? Does he have a normal life?
Let’s start from the beginning. We live in a society in which you either follow a certain norm or stand out of the crowd. We assume things about people we don’t know based on things we see or hear. And that is normal. But while we are busy making assumptions about how other people are different from us, we often forget all the things we have in common.
As humans, we basically are very alike. We are all born in similar bodies with mostly similar brains which think similar thoughts. Beyond that, a strain of choices, opportunities and genetic predispositions makes us individual. So, we see a guy restrained to a wall and think about what made him do that. We assume that our norm is normal, his isn’t.
But what if the only difference between us and someone else is honestly being ourselves including our flaws, wishes and desires? As gay men (most of us) go through the process of opening up about our sexual orientation to a generally heteronormative society. When ‘the bomb dropped’ we can finally be ourselves. We are welcomed into a community that is very open about sexuality and all kinds of fetishes and kinks.
So, since we’ve already started being honest about our sexual orientation why not be honest about our sexual desires as well?
Most of us won’t wind up bonded to a wall waiting for our master to flag us. But we might be into some spanking or soft BDSM. Or maybe we start to enjoy cross-dressing or role-playing with uniforms. Maybe we start enjoying the feeling of leather on our skin or people who are especially hairy or hairless. Whatever floats our/your boat.
I strongly believe that everyone has a fetish. It doesn’t have to be extreme or out of the box. Maybe you just like big breasts. Or the feeling off stroking hairy armpits. But we all have something. Let’s start embracing our desires and being more open about them. I sincerely believe that everyone can learn from the gay community, how refreshing it can be to be honest about what turns you on.
And if you ever wind up seeing a guy tied to a wall, don’t think about what differs you from him. Maybe think about how you are alike.
So what’s your fetish? Do you think it is weird?
Would you be comfortable telling your friends? Your parents? Your kids?
I found another interesting read on this Topic here: The psychology of fetishes